Cat Shadows

Ruwais is a town with many feral cats. You hear them yowling all of the time, you see them tipping over trash cans and, I've suspected, one ripped a hole in our screen door. Don't get me wrong, I like cats better than dogs for the most part, but they're everywhere. 

Our villa came without the general maintenance usually done before a new family moves in. It's an old house, built sometime in the 80's, and has had many families before ours. Because of this we are used to issues with the water, paint peeling off of the walls and a very difficult to manage screen and door to the back patio.

When a gash appeared in the bottom corner of the screen we knew we'd have to be careful when it was in place or the cats would waltz right in the house in search of food. (Yes, they do.) Then, the difficult-to-manage door quit functioning: it would close almost all the way, but left a 3-4 inch gap. So we closed it and the screen as much as possible when getting the downstairs ready for the night.

This particular night, Ben went to bed early because he wasn't feeling well, and as soon as he and the kids were fast asleep I looked out the bedroom door and a shadow slinked from the stairs towards the rooms... A cat! I screamed at it and it zipped back downstairs and squeezed out the door before I could get down there. I put a cookie sheet between the screen and the door to block the hole, shut the downstairs doors and hoped that would block the crazy creatures.

Maintenance takes a while to get around to anything, so for now a baby gate between the screen and the door closes the hole and all the downstairs doors closed contains it.

In Guatemala the constant dogs and firecrackers were sleep hazards and here, it's the cats! Hopefully, now, they'll stay outside sleep hazards.

How do you get Water out of a 5 Gallon Jug?

When we moved to Abu Dhabi we knew we didn't want it to be a permanent position, so we didn't buy expensive things for the house as we knew we'd have to leave most of it behind. Sometimes this can backfire, but for us it has been a good strategy...

Except for this: water in Abu Dhabi is desalinated from the Gulf and stored in huge tanks at the apartments or water towers in Ruwais. Sometimes tests on these water sources come back contaminated so most people don't drink it but rather buy these 5 gallon or so jugs of water. (Because Benjamin and I first experienced these in Guatemala and because we don't know a handy word for them in English, we still call them "garrafones.")

Figuring out a proficient, reliable way to get the water out has been challenging! Because it needs to be something the children can get by themselves, lifting the whole thing and pouring it out, though fastest, wasn't feasible for everyday life. The inverted container mechanism given to us by the first water company (first picture on left) trickled out and took so long (20 minutes) to fill a gallon jug to put on the table for supper that we soon looked for a different option.

The second pump took two size D batteries... frequently! When it started costing more for batteries than for water we looked for something simpler.

The third pump was manual. You squeeze the blue part and it suctions the water out through a hose but it was difficult to control and flimsy and would only work for the top half of the jug and we'd end up pouring the rest out by hand again on the bottom portion.

The one we are using now is yet a different version: you pump the green button on top and it pulls the water out. Benefits to this one include an arm workout every time you use it and a clean table as it splatters every time. (It is a benefit! Really!)

You never know what seemingly insignificant part of life is just waiting to provide entertainment. I never would have expected it from the water pump. I'm thankful for accessible, clean water!

The "Insh'allah" Way of Raising Children

Coming from a country where parents are arrested or turned in to Child Protective Services for letting their children walk to the park alone, and then living in a place where kidnapping and other real threats existed, there's quite a bit to get adjusted to in the Arab culture. Children here are allowed to play in the streets without an adult present, though they are usually just a few steps away in their patio area or behind their window (though that's not always the case. I've heard stories of children under 10 running a house while their parents were out of country.) I've seen them run errands at the store a block away across a street. I've seen them going to the park several blocks away on their bikes. There is something refreshing about it, though I don't trust the system enough to follow suit. It does make me wonder why there is such a huge difference... and some of it seems to always go back to the concept of "Insh'allah" or "if God wills it," a phrase used for everything. A beautiful part of this concept is the complete acceptance of physically or mentally impaired children, since they are seen as something "God willed to be this way and who are we to question that?" However, it applies to the broader theme of parenting as well as there seems to be an underlying acceptance of the thought that "nothing can happen to the child that God does not will to happen." (This concept can get challenging when trying to teach cause and effect.)

Perhaps it's also because there is a basic unity of religion. There are many things I do not know about Islam and what it has to say about raising children. I can only speak from what I've noticed in my interactions with the culture, but it makes sense that having the same core fundamental beliefs, though there are Muslims here from many different countries, would make parents more trusting of one another.
  Perhaps it's the widespread feeling of safety from a competent government and security force.  Maybe it's a combination of a lot of things, but the way of raising children in the Middle East is a stark contrast to the way of the United States. I have found it pushing me to question where the line should be drawn for a child's independence and the intricate balance between the free-range movement and cloistered children, set in the crazy reality of our world. That it causes me to question is good... but I'm still figuring out the answer.

A New Chapter

It began with the only family we had a relationship with in Ruwais deciding they were going to leave after this school year for a position somewhere else. As Ruwais is a little isolated and insular in some ways, it takes time to develop relationships and between work, life and not much to do, we just hadn't been around a lot of other people at that point. This, combined with several other reasons:
-Our children are getting older, and we want them to learn another Romance language more naturally from immersion in the culture.
-The weight of the artificial feel of things created and placed in a desert environment and
-The difficulty we've noticed people having of staying healthy here (along with other things) all combined in a decision to find a new position at the end of this contract.

I love what we have learned from this culture. I respect the people and their amazing hospitality. I appreciate the ways they have created awe-inspiring things in the desert. I am blessed to have met Muslims who very firmly believe in peace and who are trying to show the world that the terrorists you read about are not the only Muslims. I will miss with a vengeance the beautiful expats who reached out to me when I was pregnant and without support in a new place. It has been so nice to get to learn about the cultures of people from countries we haven't been in contact with before: Philippines, South Africa, UK, Holland, Nigeria, Ireland, Jordan, Egypt, India...The people are the best part of the desert.

However, we will definitely come away with a new appreciation for living green things.

(The punchline: The family who originally inspired us to start looking for a new position, will probably stay here for next year after all.)

Winter Break and the Best Part of Ruwais

The best part of living in the Western Region of Abu Dhabi is the relationships you get to build with the people. There aren't a lot of things to do unless you create them: the park, the beach, the mall or recreation center are just places that serve for meeting people. There is a wide variety of nationalities represented in this place. So, for winter break, we had the opportunity to spend time with some of these people that make this place special.

Life in Abu Dhabi has consistently been made better by Filipino friends.

Taking a break at the beach with American friends.

Spending time with our friends as a complete family is challenging during the normal work week, so having a chance to visit during this more relaxed time has been really nice. We got together with our friends from the UK and Holland as well, but it was so much fun that I only have this picture, snapped by a friend as I was playing darts. (I won! It was luck. My method is simple: chunk the dart at the target and hope it hits!)

Ezra helping me play darts...

We've enjoyed having time to get to know our Nigerian neighbor better as well. She was a hairdresser in Nigeria and she asked if she could do Talia's hair one day. Talia had fun with it! She has taught us a few words in Yoruba and helped us learn more about her home countries food and custom

Our Nigerian friend fixed Talia's hair for Winter break.

As many of the people we began our desert journey with are ending their contracts and planning to move on, it is nice to touch base again with the friends we have together in this particular moment before everyone scatters again. This particular mix of people will probably never be together, even on the same continent, again. This is part of living the expat teacher life that is surprising sometimes, (like when you DO end up with someone you knew from a different continent together again on a completely new one) sad sometimes (It's always hard to leave/watch leave) and inspiring you to seize the moment every time.

Green Spaces

I recently had a conversation with a friend comparing this desert to the desert of Las Vegas. Las Vegas, they said, was all sand, buildings and plastic "grass." Coming to Ruwais, then, it was refreshing to find more trees and grass than they had expected. 

There is an extensive gardening and landscaping effort throughout each city I've visited in Abu Dhabi. Miles and miles of Palm trees line the highways watered by even more miles of black hoses that utilize desalinated water from the gulf and give gardeners from places like  Bangladesh and jobs.

I have read some complaints about the amount of energy and water that is used to produce these green places in the desert and I'm not sure how to solve that problem, but every time I see these green places, I appreciate them. I'm not sure there's a way to measure, but I would bet it helps people stay sane and continue living here longer.

Ezra 9.5 Months

Ezra has been growing up so quickly! It's amazing to see how different each child is from each other, even at 9 (and 1/2) months!

The weather has been beautiful lately and only started heating up the last couple of days. Because of this they've been able to ride bikes outside a lot and Ezra loves joining them on the fenced front patio in his walker. He loves feeling the breeze, and watching his brother and sister play, but if we aren't careful, he also tries to sample leaves from the trees. 

He is in the beginning stages of walking and very curious about everything within reach. He's a very social child and is always very focused on a person's eyes, mouth and reading their body language. He is quick to smile and laugh at strangers, (if I'm holding him,) and overall a happy baby. It's so sweet to see him light up when he sees his brother or sister or father walk through the door! 

Something I haven't been able to find the words to write about is the friend and midwife I had with Elias passing away in June. I still don't have the words. Thalia's receptionist/accountant/friend/birth assistant got a box of fabric from her husband to give away. In it she found a quilt Thalia had started for me/Ezra and she finished it and sent it. I bawled when I got it from the post office. It's a Spanish themed quilt with words in Spanish and English and pictures of typical Spanish scenes. It is perfect and a treasure that seems fitting for where we would like a future placement.

We are so blessed to have Ezra in our lives. We all smile more with him here!

Our Neighbors Have a Mango Tree

Sometimes it's surprising how something so insignificant as our neighbors having a mango tree has several small impacts on our own lives. It's not something I would have even though to consider when moving to this house.

The back yards of the villas here are separated by walls about 7 feet tall. The walls have a gap on each end about 4 inches wide, so it isn't exactly private. Some people have opted to fill the gaps with boards, bricks or climbing vines. I wonder if this were for the convenience of the cats to wander through each yard, though they seem to have no trouble scaling the sealed ones.

The neighbors on both sides of our back yard patio have mango trees. One of them hangs over our clothes line. In the spring, all of the pollen falls on our drying clothes. In the summer green mangoes plop around and as the season progresses, ripe ones ferment on the ground over the fence filling the air with a sweet, sticky, fruit smell. The ants make trails from their homes to the mangoes and march back and forth until it is gone.

Talia and Elias collect the fallen, brown mango leaves and pretend they are gardeners. Talia crunches the leaves in her hands and Elias follows her directions to "fertilize" different areas of the garden with them. His bare little baby-looking feet slap, slap on the bricks as he runs from the terraced part of the patio to the grassy part looking for a bare spot to distribute the "fertilizer."

Looking up into the mango tree.

School children play behind the back wall yard of our villa and the ones we are sandwiched between. They throw stones at the mangos and use tubing from the watering system for the school yard to reach up and try to knock down the mangos. Once, when I was out hanging clothes on the line, several of the boys from the school had managed to grab a branch and get up into the tree. I said "get down" and they did. The school ground caretakers are more smooth about it, they get a long branch and tie a small stick to the end so that they can snag the branch right above the mango and jerk it down. When that isn't available, they are strong and flexible: They run at the wall and grab the top and with a few kicks and grunts are up the side and onto the roof of the terrace, up the tree and tossing the mangos down for the others to catch. The school grounds caretakers are always careful to put the mess made from the mango leaves right back into they yard that hosts the tree. Occasionally a hand shoves some over our section of the wall on accident.

One weekend our engineer-neighbors, who share the house provided by their company with the mango tree in the back, climbed up in the tree and harvested the majority of the mangos. I noticed because I was upstairs and was startled to see that there was a man even with our upstairs window in our bedroom.

Three mangos happened to land on our brick patio, kamikaze style. The impact busted the end that made contact. I let it ripen, but only half was ripening. Talia and I tried it, the ripe end was sweet and the green end tart like a sour candy. They were both delicious. The flavor wasn't enough to drive us to scale the neighbor's fence, but we did understand why so many green mangos were being sold in the markets!

Ezra's Birth Story

April 23, 2014

I woke up to my water breaking around 4:30 a.m. and as soon as I was sure... which only took about a minute, (there was a LOT,) I woke up Ben, who excitedly got up and took a shower. I wasn't having many contractions yet, and was surprised to have things happen in this order. With Elias, I went into labor and my water didn't break until just a little while before the pushing stage. Because of that, we had decided before to go to the hospital when my water broke, but, now I wasn't so sure. I got dressed while Ben was getting ready and called our friend to let her know (thank God for friends you can trust with your kids when you go into labor.) We decided to go ahead and take the kids and then go to the hospital and get through all of the paperwork.

The timing was perfect, Ben's alarm was set to get up and go to work just a few minutes after my water broke, if it had broken any later, he'd have probably been gone and had to drive back. It was a good day for him to be off, and happened where he was able to be with me three days and get the weekend in the middle of that as well. It was good timing for the kids to go to someone's house at the beginning of the day where they could go back to bed and everyone start on a sort of normal schedule. Our friend's car was in the shop at this time also, so not being in an emergency to get the kids there before going to the hospital was a blessing.

At the hospital there were so many ways I could see answered prayers. There were a million little ways every decision could have gone a completely different way and I could have been forced into something like induction, Cesarian, shots or other medications, and it didn't happen. I was able to refuse everything and sign waivers, not really what you want to deal with in labor, but much better than having no choice. The more nervous midwife who was having trouble letting me walk around and labor in peace went off shift and was replaced with a much more relaxed one. The doctors left me alone to labor for the most part except for a few instances and I was able to do it within the hospital's 6-12 hour policy for after water breaks. (Elias' labor was much longer than 6 hours, Ezra's was almost 6 exactly.)

Ezra was born at 10:45 a.m. and was 7 lbs, 12 oz and 19 inches long.

We practiced nursing all evening and he did really well… and apparently had at least 3 diaper’s full of green goo to show for it. I didn’t have the intense shaking like after Elias, just a little bit. The next day the pediatrician said Ezra was OK to go. The doctor released me as well, so 24 hours after delivering him, we were leaving. (The nurses acted surprised by that, but I’m not sure why.) I just know I felt like I was escaping jail as I left and the relief of not having anything else to refuse was intense. Recovery has been much easier than with either of my other births, and I'm so thankful for that.

So, now I have had a medicated, vaginal hospital birth with Talia, a natural homebirth with Elias and an unmedicated, vaginal hospital birth with Ezra. If given the choice, I would choose a homebirth again without hesitation. I’m thankful that this one went as well as it did and I'm so thankful for many answered prayers.   

Ezra is healthily beautiful and tiny (after being with Elias) and full of grins and cute noises.We're so happy to welcome him to our family!

Ruwais Mall

When you move to a new place, I've found that it's usually best to try to live within what the culture has available rather than constantly trying to recreate things from home without the right ingredients. This is what we do most of the time, with the occasional special treat of making things like flour tortillas or other things we miss from Texas and Guatemala. What we've been able to experience this way, as a bonus, is one of the best parts of travel abroad: the local cuisine. In a multicultural place like Abu Dhabi, this has meant  a combination of Filipino, Indian, and a variety of Middle Eastern foods.

In Ruwais, especially, this has been the experience since the variety found in the many-malled area of Abu Dhabi is not available in this desert town a good 2.5 hours away, so finding something we missed from home even for special occasions was either a "see if someone feels like mailing it" or "just do without" thing. Part of this has changed with the new Ruwais Mall.

Some of the main things found at the mall that were difficult to get otherwise are flour tortillas, sour cream and salsa, some of our most missed and not-easy-to-make items. We still will only get them for special occasions, but it's nice to have the option!  Some other ways this will add variety to Ruwais, (soon, since all of the shops are not open yet) will include restaurants beyond the Indian/Arabic food option available, a wider variety of clothes and office/school supplies, baby supply shop and even a nutrition shop that might have more natural options for things like toothpaste, deodorant and coconut oil. That's what is important  to me... I know many of the other ladies are excited about a beauty salon and cinema.

I don't even know half of the new options this is going to provide, there's not too much I miss besides people and certain foods (I'm sure there's a connection there...) and I generally don't like malls, but just adding another air conditioned option for walking around during the the 100-125 degree months is a welcome diversion here.

Seen in Abu Dhabi: 22

A grape the size of a small plum. I couldn't find a label to tell where it was grown...

Our third baby is a...

It's a boy!

And he's already making dramatic poses.

Figuring out Transportation and Community in Ruwais

One of the hardest parts of moving every year or so is the adjustment to the loss of community and the need to rebuild it. This is easier in some places than in others. Abu Dhabi city had several easy transportation options: many taxis, buses, lots of things within walking distance.

Ruwais is different. Taxis are supposedly available, but the one time I called one he said he'd be here in 40 minutes and after 2 hours passed he said he'd be here in 15 minutes and after a few missed calls and another hour said he was lost and gave up. We will have to see if calling the main number gives better results next time. There are buses, but I still need to figure out where to get a map for them or figure out a good time to drag everyone out when Ben's available to see if I can get a driver's license. There are a few things within walking distance: park, little market and a recreation center; but mostly there are millions of villas that look identical to each other all tacked together in rows and rows of neighborhoods. Very few of the women I've met, (and I don't see many out during the day,)  have spoken English, except for the Filipino cashier at the market... so, we're still figuring out the whole community thing at the moment.

When a good friend visited from the States, we took the opportunity to get registered at the hospital (in case of an emergency so we don't have to fill out all of the paperwork before getting treatment) here and check out the beach a short drive away, since she could drive with a U.S. license as a tourist, but I can't legally as a resident.

Some issues this presents at the moment is a difficulty getting to the hospital if I were in labor, and a lack of people to leave the children with. Since Ben works an hour away, I should be able to labor pretty well at home until the last minute to avoid interventions at the hospital and give him time to get here.

Being here a month has brought up things like these that we are still figuring out. There's always a new type of challenge, everywhere we move.

Wind/Sand/Rain/Hail Storm in the Western Region

Yesterday a really strong sandstorm had Ben's bus pulled over on the side of the road a few times on the way home from super-strong winds and super-low visibility. The wind was strong enough to blow sand in between the doors of the bus. They managed to outrun it for a little bit and then it overtook them again. He finally made it home an hour later than usual. Being a bus driver in these conditions must be really stressful!

Later that night very strong winds blew into Ruwais and following the sand storm was crazy rain and really strong lightning and thunder! I was surprised to hear hail following. Our electricity went out for a few hours, and this woke me up and I laid there remembering how Guatemala often had these drippy sounds running in the background of daily life during the rainy season.

Today it has continued to rain, at a much calmer pace and without as much wind, all day, but the destruction (mostly to the vegetation) from last night's wind is still visible.

Moving from Abu Dhabi to Ruwais

Living in the bustling city of Abu Dhabi with around 200 nationalities surrounding us, the many different versions of English seem to be the default language. With less of an opportunity to learn Arabic and a thriving desire to do so, Ben looked around and spied a place away from the city... out in the western region... near camel farms and the desert version of country life, where most of the students and fellow teachers don't speak much English and found a place where he could probably learn Arabic with more immersion: Al Sila'a.

Nature colors Mix at the Port of Dalma Near Ruwais

We will be living about an hour from there in the community of Ruwais. (pronounced: "Roo-wayse") It is about two hours from Abu Dhabi. In the 1970-80's the Abu Dhabi National Oil Company built compounds in several areas with shopping areas, gyms, grocery stores, houses, parks, schools and hospitals within a 6km block. We are supposed to be placed in a villa inside one of these, which means all of the amenities like gym and beach passes, are free. Ruwais seems to have everything I liked about Abu Dhabi, and not the things I didn't, plus some extras like a free gym and more families with children. We will be able to visit Abu Dhabi once or twice a month, but, as with any move, I will still miss so many of our friends who live here.

Here are a few Facebook photo albums of Ruwais if you're interested in more pictures:
https://www.facebook.com/ruwais.pulse

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.583105298389709.1073741838.578389815527924&type=1

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.358156627611563.116106.358092837617942&type=1

http://ruwais.ae/

Ruwais Pulse 

I hope to learn about it first-hand soon and share my own pictures and experiences.